Friday, October 26, 2012

The Greatest Invention Ever: Hamburger Shoes

I had a great idea earlier it was hamburger shoes. That's right the greatest idea of a generation and it comes so easily to me. I don't claim to be a genius but I will gladly take the monicker thrust upon me like a Japanese schoolgirl on a bullet train. Not to say that it is true but I will tell you the truth of the following statement.

The Hamburger shoes are the greatest idea of this bright new century.

I have 3 bulleted statement to back up my genius as well as follow up to those beautiful some might even say holy points.

  • The Hamburger shoes make winter not only the most bearable season but the most enjoyable.
For millennia mankind has searched for the proper way to keep his lower extremities not only dry but warm. The brilliancy of hamburger shoes not only allows for reheatable footwear but the buns keep the feet dry from the melting ice. Not only do these gift from the god in the form of footwear keep the feet dry and warm they also allow the masses to eat a delicious meal when they make it home if they are hunger or lost in the woods. No longer will people have to eat the leather of there shoes when their shoes are an amalgamation of beef, lettuce, tomato and pickles. the economy will boom with the constant purchase of these meal-icious mukluks.

  • I mentioned that people could enjoy the delicious boots, but they could feed an entire family. And that is only 1 foot.
The sizes of each shoe would make these delicious shoes more than extra extra large and a single foot could feed a family of 3 with easy. An entire family could eat all winter on a single seasons footwear. Even while eating their shoes people could wear the remains keeping their tootsies toasty on toasted bread.

  • The economy will boom with the creation of these fried footwear.
The prices fro these shoes would amount to the expense of a single hamburgers at your favorite fast food restaurant (not dollar menu of course). no longer would the world have to endure the fact that 3 year old's are making their cheap footwear in 3rd world countries. The global conscience would rise as well as the health rate for people walking for their meals. The world would become a planet of Jareds.

These are the reasons why the hamburger shoe is the great invention of the 21th century! I will accept all praise and fame you decide to throw at me. Thank you!

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