Friday, May 27, 2011

The Savior Guide Part 3

Jumping back into the action I am here to present you with a great little article, in my opinion. But where the second edition of The Savior Guide seemed to be me trying just to be funny I went back to the original and tried my best to capture the feel and emptied my mind of all things except what I wanted I will say I did get a few moments where I threw a few jokes in that I think worked and added as I thought of them. So hopefully this will be as good as the original if not better but hopefully just not as bad as the 2nd. So sadly no groups just a few favorites.

Name: Todd "ToddInTheShadows" Nathanson

Gender: Male (For all we know)

Body type: Lean (For all we know)

Age (approximate): We assume he is 22 but his real age could be anything from 11 (He's been playing for 11 years) to 69.

Skills: Playing Piano (Ability to read music), can blend into a crowd

Bio: ToddInTheShadows has been a blogger on and musical talent on YouTube until 2010. He was a fan of the site for a long time before deciding to become part of the Channel Awesome family. He found the site through “5 Second Movies” before the site went live in April of 2008. He's a reviewer of current pop songs that are bad, and plans to expand into the realm of past music in the future.

He has alternately claimed that he hides his face to protect his position as a Sunday school teacher, as a secret agent, and as White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs. At other times, he has said that he doesn't want his face attached to the "hamburger incident." His image-consciousness led him to do his reviews in profile silhouette, which adds to his mysteriousness.

Todd claims that he didn't get into pop music until an incident in 2007 when the antenna came off of his car. Because he didn't have money to fix it, he listened to pop music over and over because that was the only station that came on, and eventually he got into it.

Show/site: Todd's Pop Song Reviews (Nothing special by way of title, but don't judge the series by the title)
ToddInTheShadows YouTube, ToddInTheShadows on TGWTG

(In a zombie situations, unless they are relevant)
Pros: Can withstand high amounts of torture (he listens to pop music by choice for God sake!), He like the ninja can hide in the shadows

Cons: Might be a zombie in disguise, hard to find to save or exterminate (unlike Waldo), Might secretly enjoy Hannah Montana, Might be watching us masturbate

Name: Lewis "Linkara" Lovhaug

Gender: He is a Man!

Body type: Average

Age (approximate): 23

Skills: Very articulate, can be imposing, capable of organizing a large scale rebellion, leadership skills, it has been reported that he has a mean p-p-p-pokerface

Bio: Linkara is the pseudonym for Lewis Lovhaug, a Minnesotan comic book reviewer and author. The name comes from a series of self-published books that he wrote at ages 14-19 (and subsequently plans to revisit since he wants to revise them to fix plot problems, characterizations, and various other mistakes he made because he was young and inexperienced). Linkara was one of the earliest pick-ups of channel awesome becoming a flagship member of the site. Linkara's videos are probably most notable for the amount of quotes he has generated as well as his avoidance of using profanity

Show/site: Atop the Fourth Wall, 5 Panel Comics and History of the Power Rangers
Atop The Fourth Wall Blog, Linkara on TGWTG

(In a zombie situations, unless they are relevant)
Pros: During the Year 2 Event: Kickassia Linkara lead the forces of Channel Awesome in a successful rebellion against the Nostalgia Critic, According to a firsthand account by AngryJoe Linkara can bluff with the best of them, defeated a nearly undefeatable enemy with the help of his loyal allies

Cons: A nasty Wasty (so says the Critic), maybe a little too caring, when the opportunity to rise in power Linkara was instantly power mad, maybe a little too chummy with the undead (His "magic" gun)

Name: Phelan "Phelous" Porteous

Gender: Male

Body type: Average to slightly muscular

Age (approximate): 25

Skills: ability to remain cool under pressure, healing Factory, death immunity, mastery of editing

Bio: Phelous is a Canadian citizen and mainly reviews Horror films. Phelous was picked up on the site around December 2008 with his video Mac and Me, and Mike asked users to post their opinions on him. It seemed to be divided right down the middle. Mike then posted a few more Phelous videos such as "Phelous Knows What He Shouldn't Have Watched Last Summer" and "Funny Games" before Phelous officially became a member of the site.

Show/site: Phelous (Phelous Who [?]), Phelous on TGWTG

(In a zombie situations, unless they are relevant)
Pros: He's got a shotgun, His constant death either means he is immune to the zombie virus or he is the first in a line of super zombies, Hates Eli Roth (like most people should), possible Time Lord

Cons: He might be one of those quite ones everyone says it always is, Might be a genetically superior super zombie, very uncreative (Phelous' unnamed show), Canadian

Name: Nash "Nash" Bozard

Gender: Male

Body type: overweight

Age (approximate): 37

Skills: can take continued mental strain without breaking, unparalleled common sense, management skills

Bio: Nash is known on the forums as the man behind "What the Fuck Is Wrong with You?” a show where he looks at people doing strange or just plain idiotic things. Outside the website, Nash is responsible for, a live show that's been in the running for ten years. He was announced as a contributor on the 58th edition of Transmission Awesome. The Origins of Radio Dead Air started in a role-playing game in character where it later grew into its own series. Every week Nash suffers through the worst the internet has to offer taking stories that would break any ordinary man in an instance. And you can send them to him!

Show/site: WTFIWWY (What the Fuck Is Wrong with You?), Doctor Who Classic
Radio Dead, Nash on TGWTG

(In a zombie situations, unless they are relevant)
Pros: Internet DJ (just as good if not better than a radio DJ), Nash has a smooth voice that can be used to calm and comfort people as he leads them to the safe haven of your home, he can help create new laws for after all the pleasantries of the current world have disintegrated to ash

Cons: No man can walk through that must shit without smelling it...meaning he will go crazy eventually don't be near him when he does, he might slow you down

So when it all comes down to survival these people will prove to be very valuable. And really is it possible to put a monetary value on human life? Good thing I’m just going with a rating system of out of 5.

Todd “Todd in the Shadows” Nathanson: 4/5
We are the music makers and the dreamers, but I still don’t trust that he isn’t a zombie under that hood.

Lewis “Linkara” Lovhaug: 5/5
I wouldn’t want to live in a world without Linkara, he is an inspiring person who always reminds me I am indeed a man.

Phelan “Phelous” Porteous: 4/5
Seriously he would be rated better but we don’t need too many smart asses at the end of the world. And I’m not giving up my place!

Nash “Nash” Bozard: 3/5
He really can help but for the most part just stick him in a radio tower with specific instructions to get you and survivors to safety.

Check out the Channel Awesome affiliates.

More to come!

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